Often, as husbands and wives, we tend to place our worth in how our spouse behaves toward us. At such times, if we are accepted and loved by him or her, we see ourselves as worthy and so we feel secure. On the other hand, if we are rejected by our spouse and our foundational security lies in this relationship, we likely will be devastated and broken.
Whether or not we have placed our sense of personal worth into the hands of this significant individual, marital breakdown always brings with it deep emotional distress. This grieving process is natural and should not be avoided. However, there are many promises God has made which will help carry you through.
Hear the comforting words of Isaiah: "'O you afflicted one, tossed with tempest, and not comforted, behold I will lay your stones with colourful gems, and lay your foundations with sapphires....In righteousness you shall be established...whoever assembles against you shall fall for your sake.... No weapon formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue which rises against you in judgment you shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is from Me,' says the Lord" (Isaiah 54:11-17).
Further on, this prophet wrote the following words for the children of Israel, which also describes our Saviour's love and faithfulness toward us: "He the Lord said, 'Surely they are My people?' ...and so He became their Saviour. In all their affliction, He was afflicted, and the Angel of His presence saved them; In His love and in His pity He redeemed them; and He bore them and carried them all the days of old" (Isaiah 63:8,9).
We can be sure that our Lord is very near to us when our hearts are broken, for He promised He would "...heal the brokenhearted...comfort all who mourn...give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness" (Psalm 147:3; Isaiah 61:1-3).
Practically speaking, we all need to become more gifted in the art of selfless loving, for we must each truly know what it means to lay down our own individual lives for another.
In the marital relationship, Paul deals with this concept of love very explicitly by saying to husbands, "...love your wives, just as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for it..."(Ephesians 5:25). Wives, in turn, are instructed to love their husbands, be desirous of them (see Genesis 3:16), and submit to them "as to the Lord" (Ephesians 5:22).
Actually, submission is just another more active form of showing love. If both partners were to consistently obey these principles of God's love, there would be no serious marital difficulties. Unfortunately, problems always stem from sin areas.
This is why we must be obedient to God's ways and remember to pray earnestly for our mates. When we do our part, the Lord will take care of the rest.
May God's blessing be upon you and your loved ones. May your marriage be restored and your love be made complete through Jesus Christ.
Crossroads is happy to help. In fact, that's the whole reason we exist as a ministry. The daily 100 Huntley Street telecast and the 24-hour-a-day Telephone Ministry line are here for the same reason. You may want to call us as you are reading this: 1-866-273-4444
God loves you and we love you! Please give us the privilege of doing our best to help more. For further ministry, you may contact the Crossroads Ministry Centre by writing to:
Crossroads Christian Communications Inc.
Attn: National Ministry Centre
PO Box 5100
Burlington, Ontario L7R 4M2
